The Kicker (satire)- Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is clearly not satisfied with just five Super Bowl titles. In fact, he visited an experimental surgery clinic in Europe this offseason to add a sixth finger to his right hand in preparation for earning another ring.
“Will this affect my throwing mechanics? No,” Brady said definitively. “In fact, it will just improve my grip on the ball. And it’s not cheating, because Gisele said I could do this.”
Brady’s surgery has inspired other NFL players to try similar medical procedures.
“I only have two rings right now,” explained Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski. “So I should remove two fingers from my left hand so that I can put a third ring on my third finger? Is this how this works?”
This is classic, you just know a 6th is coming. This season has that special feeling. Between all the additions this team made this offseason and coming off a Super Bowl win already, it certainly has the make up of a special year. In all honesty, if you’re a defensive coordinator, how do you game plan for this team? They’re stacked at every position and depth is a huge thing. You can blitz Brady all you want, but you’ll just see a heavy diet of quick passes and screens all day.
I can’t wait for football, it’s going to be a long 90+ days of waiting, but for now, we can hype ourselves up, we have plenty of time.